Your Nervous System and Sleep Training

by | Mar 22, 2024 | Baby Sleep, Mental Health, Motherhood

I am a Qualified BACP Registered Therapist. I have been working with families for 17 years. I have always had a gift of connecting with people on a deeper level and use my intuition to emotionally support you and your family. 

I am here to talk to you about your Nervous System and Sleep Training. I often have people call me and tell me they tried Controlled Crying, and it was horrendous, and they gave up at night 3. There are several reasons as to why this happens. Firstly, every baby is different so does not fit a text book routine, which means your baby may need a little extra awake time or go to bed earlier to avoid overtiredness tears which are worse than a normal cry. Secondly often parents are exhausted and overwhelmed; reacting to crying in the middle of the night as opposed to following a sleep plan. Then there is a Sleep Training Sleep Regression on night 3 or 4 which means your baby is testing you out with your new sleep approach; this can involve slightly increased levels of resistance in comparison to the first night of training. Next you have catnappers who are overtired which again increases the tears. The other thing to consider is your child’s temperament. Controlled Crying is not always the best method for every child. If you are a gentle parent or do not want your child crying a lot, or your child is sensitive or suffers anxiety you may want to opt for a hands on, in room Sleep method. 

When we experience a Nervous System Stress Response we may be functioning from a Parasympathetic or Sympathetic State. This can cause the Freeze, fight, or flight activation. Some of these symptoms can include changes to heart rate, construction of muscles, dulled sensations, cognitive impairment, emotional numbing, rapid breathing, sweating, heightened alertness, heightened senses, difficulty concentrating, fear, racing thoughts or urges to escape. Birth trauma, raising young children, Sleep Deprivation and even the thought of Sleep Training may trigger any of these responses. 

Here I am discussing the response in the body to Sleep Deprivation and Sleep Training. When we sleep train together my focus for you and your family is to use a Sleep Training Method that does not trigger Nervous System Responses and to hold a space for you and monitor your emotions during our Training together. This is exactly why you will stay within your comfort levels when we implement your Sleep Method during our training together. 

When we work together, I will help you track your Nervous System where you can begin to understand the language that your body speaks during our actual Sleep Training. The Nervous System is made up of cells, tissues, and organs that coordinate and regulate the activities of the body. It received sensory information from the environment which is why some people freeze when thinking about Sleep Training. The lack of knowledge and information involved around what Sleep Training actually is can also sometimes cause nervous system responses with limited beliefs around leaving your baby to cry, not being able to attend to them, being stuck in a routine or dropping night feeds too early on. When you work with me, we break down this information and your Sleep Plan is based on Scientifically Proven Sleep Methods and completely personalised to you and your family as well as age appropriate. When I choose a Sleep Method for you it’s based on your child’s temperament, your parenting values, and your personal circumstances. 

I will ensure you and your family are operating from your Ventral Vagal. We will choose a Sleep Method that is suitable to your baby keeping your babies nervous system regulated whilst tracking your child’s response alongside yours and your partners. 

Outside of Sleep Training if you are suffering from depression, anxiety or overwhelm; I offer talking therapy for adults. You can find the full details here:


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